Why I Hate New Year’s Resolutions (But Sorta Do Them Anyway)

This time of year clearly provides us with a natural end accompanied by a natural beginning; something about midnight on December 31st seems to mark a new season filled with new expectations, new hopes, new dreams.

And often, we make New Year’s Resolutions a part of that transition.

They are often borne out of a measure of regret (perhaps spurred on by too many holiday cookies?)—things like losing weight, spending more time with family and friends, getting regular exercise, quitting a bad habit, getting out of debt, etc.

The thing about New Year’s Resolutions is, I never do them.

I mean, sometimes I make them, but I never do them.

Sure, I might be more dutiful in getting to the gym during the month of January.  I might do a better job of being present when in the company of loved ones, but soon enough, life seems to return to Business as Usual, and then I’m stuck back in the old patterns.

I imagine I’m not the only one who feels this way.

And so I typically avoid making New Years Resolutions, because I know I’m not really going to accomplish them anyways.  And rather than avoid the feeling of failure, I’d rather just avoid the Resolutions and call it a day…

And so for those reasons, I don’t make them.

But there’s another side to the New Year that I’ve found myself embracing over the recent years.  I like to call them “Goals”, because I can’t keep a Resolution, but I’m much better at reaching toward Goals.

I know—sometimes we can be our own worst psychologists, I get it.  But these things work for me…

Let me explain:  If I say I want to lose weight, I can put that off until March if I feel like it.  If I gain at the beginning of the year, it makes it that much more gratifying to get back to December weight under the auspices of losing weight.  Success!

If I say I want to spend more time with family and friends, I can host a party, go on a vacation, and then check those boxes off my list and move on with how things were before December 31st.  By the time fall and winter arrive, I feel like a failure because I either didn’t do my Resolution, or I did it in January and failed to continue doing it the rest of the year.

So my cure?  Goals!

Here’s what I mean:  Last year, my goal both personally and professionally was simply to add value.

That’s it. 

I’ve tried my best to frame my personal and professional decisions around that singular goal:  was I adding value to those around me?  As a business owner, how did Wild Goose Coffee do at adding value to its customers?  How well did I add value to my family members, investing in them and their lives?

See what I’m getting at? 

Rather than have something I can check off my list as “done”, or on the other extreme, have something far too lofty to realistically attain, I set my sights on a goal that can guide all actions and decisions throughout the year.

And it’s only one goal. 

If you’re able to juggle several resolutions in your head for 12 months, I admire your memory.  As for me, I can only handle one, and it better not be more than 3 words or I’m in trouble.

“Add Value”.

My goal for 2016?  Grow.

As I frame business decisions, vacation plans, get-togethers with friends, volunteer commitments, church commitments, books I read—everything will be focused around that one, simple, central theme.

And that, I believe, is something that I can attain.  I can grow.  I can add value.  I can assess my progress in these areas and be able to feel successful at the end of a year.

And I can look forward to 2016, and anticipate with hope all of the growth I’ll be able to experience.

Because resolutions will more than likely fail us; but goals, in my opinion, are far more effective, and as a result, far more productive.

So go ahead—brainstorm a single goal for yourself for 2016.  Sit on it for a while, mull it over in your head, (personally, I pray about it throughout the entire process) because a goal is worth nothing if you don’t genuinely believe in it with all that you are.

And when you do believe in it, you’ll invest yourself in it.  And I predict by this time next year, you’ll be able to look back on the previous 12 months with a sense of genuine satisfaction at a job well done.

As you process your goal, if you’re bold enough to share it below, I would encourage you to do so.  If you don’t share it here, please share it somewhere, and with someone, because there is nothing more powerful that articulating that goal to someone else.  Because if you can say it out loud, and with a measure of seriousness in your voice, then chances are you’ll hit it out of the park.

So may your 2016 be full, and may you reach your one goal with every decision throughout each day and each month.  And if we're fortunate, 12 months from now, we'll all be able to look back on our year with deep satisfaction...